Pound
by witchwannaB
Summary: Pound, pound, pound. My head against the door. Locked inside a bathroom stall. Pound, pound. My black robes flutter. Pound.rnA girl struggles with her sexuality through self-injury.


Preface

_I_

_have mousy brown hair and pale skin. I bite my nails. I'm failing two of my classes. My mother is frightened of me. My father underestimates my abilities. My older brother is ashamed, for I've practically disappeared. I hate me. No boy has ever bothered to look my way. Until him. I don't know what he sees in me. But it makes me happy knowing at least one person cares._

_He_

_has soft sandy hair and freckled skin. He laughs at himself. All his grades are dead average. His mother adores him. His father is a Muggle, who, although wary around magic, loves him all the same. He has no siblings. He likes himself. A few girls have passed his way, but he wasn't interested. Until me. But then he found her. He's happier than usual these days._

_She_

_has silky black hair and tan skin. She acts like she's on top of the world. Her grades are high, but not so high that others are jealous. Her mother dotes on her. Her father obeys her every wish. Her twin sister does what she does because she does not have better ideas herself. She thinks she defines perfection. Boys are all over her, but she never paid attention to them. Until him. A boy to worship her is just what she wanted. So she's the happiest she's been for ages._

_I fancy him. He asked me to the Yule Ball. We went together. He whispered in my ear that he fancied me. I told him I fancied him back. He noticed her a month later. He broke things off with me. She received flowers and love notes. He asked her out. She accepted, and he became hers. I still fancy him. She was my best friend._

Pound, pound, pound. My head against the door. Locked inside a bathroom stall. Pound, pound. My black robes flutter. Pound.

I'm so jealous. I want to be you. Pound. You have someone to love. Someone to hold. And he loves you back. Pound.

My mind is screaming. Pound, pound. It wants out. Pound. I can't believe you. You're living my life. You stole it. Pound, pound, pound.

I'm so jealous. I want….Pound, pound. I want to be you. I want him. I need some love. Pound.

Sounds echo around me. Pound. My head is aching. I want out. Pound, pound. Where are you? You're supposed to be stopping me. Pound, pound, pound.

I'm so jealous. He has you. He holds you every day. Pound, pound. I want to hold you. I want to have you. Pound. I want him to kiss me. Pound.

Pound, pound. The words are racing through my mind. Black is growing around me. Pound. My head, the metal, the sound. Pound.

I'm so jealous. I have no one. Pound, pound, pound. So lonely in here. Pound. I'm addicted to your voice. I ache to feel his arms. You have what I want. Pound, pound.

I told you to come. Pound. But you're not here. Upstairs in a closet with him. Pound, pound. My knees are bending. Why won't you come? Pound, pound.

I'm so jealous. You're in love. Pound. And with him, not me. You have everything I want. It's just not fair. Pound, pound, pound.

My vision is dying. But I keep banging. Pound. My body doesn't know any else. Bathroom walls echoing my fear. Pound, pound. No one is here….Pound.

I'm so jealous. You forgot. Because you're too caught up in him. Pound, pound. I want him, want to kiss him. You're in my way. Pound, pound, pound.

Pound. The door flies open. Black robes meet my face. Pound? Hands stop me. Thick ones, thin ones. I cannot tell. Pound?

I'm so jealous. You love him, he loves you. And still you're here. But are you? Pound? Smells and shapes appear before me. They're masculine. He's here in your place. Pound?

A wand in front of my face. What will he do? I forget my attempts to destroy me. A spell is said, but I cannot hear the words. And I'm falling onto the bathroom floor…

* * *

**A/N: **_A few people have reviewed saying they couldn't wait to read the next chapter. Sorry, guys, but _this is a one-shot_. Additionally, someone posted saying that it was great how I got into Hermione's head. Thanks for the compliment, but the main character _isn't _Hermione. She isn't part of this story at all. _  



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